My first time, part two

My first big cock: The average erect penis is from 4.7 to 6.3 inches and that's been my experience. It all matters in how you use it, guys. A man with a big cock can be fabulous if he is a skilled lover. On the other hand, I've had some average men who were among my best because of the same abilities.

My first experience with size was mixed at best. A fraternity brother had led me to the basement during a party and we fucked. I was still lying, miniskirt hiked up, there trying to catch my breath when another shape appeared, unzipped his pants and displayed the biggest cock I'd yet seen.

He climbed on and pushed in. Between pussy juice and the cum in me I was thankfully well lubed. It still hurt for several minutes, then felt better, then really good. After he was done, I saw a line of guys waiting their turn, grabbed my clothes and ran out.

My first anal sex: I know you guys have been waiting for this. Lots of men had wanted to take me in the ass but I held off until I was married. I didn't have many "firsts" I could offer my husband, but this was a big one.

"I want you to fuck me in the ass," I said during a lovemaking session. He got out KY and put me on my knees.

First he entered by pussy and fucked me slow and sweet. I felt his finger slide into my anus, syncopating with his cock moving in and out of my pussy. Then two fingers. Finally, he pulled out and rested the head of his penis against my perineum, then slowly entered me. "Am I hurting you?" he asked. "No," I said, although it was uncomfortable as he fucked me.

I didn't come from this but it was still thrilling, especially thinking of what my uptight family would think of their little cheerleader honor student getting it up the ass. "You're a very naughty girl, Linda," my husband panted, instinctively understanding. He had a violent orgasm and I felt him shooting in me. He stayed there until he went flaccid and we showered together.

My first public sex: This is a tough one. The summer I lost my virginity, I cheated on my sweet boyfriend with a bad boy from high school on whom I'd had a crush. One night we drove into the country and he fucked me on the hood of his muscle car.

It was wildly erotic to be outside, the breeze running across my legs, my moans and screams out there wafting into the woods. But nobody was there. He said he would never get the dents removed from his hood.

The first "official" time was when I was having an affair with one of my professors — common then, but a fireable offense in our neo-Puritan age.

Believe me, I was not being taken advantage of. Anyway, it was winter and the sun had set early. I went down on him and sucked his cock a long time. Then I sat on his desk and he fucked me. After, I saw that a crowd had gathered at a window of a nearby building and had seen the whole thing. They applauded. I smiled and curtsied. My lover was mortified and always closed the blinds after that.

Size queens and fellatio

In praise of big cocks. I've had a few. Some guys think all they have to do is show up; some well endowed men can be duds, while a responsive, caring man of average size is just fine.

Still, my big boys love it when I get them really aroused, unspool all that cock and then start madly sucking the head and glans with my mouth, while running my hand in a corkscrew motion up and down the shaft. As I increase the urgency of my moves, even the most taciturn guy will start moaning. He knows I want his come.

A well-endowed boyfriend would tease me by calling me a size queen, and it's true that I love a big package. He was a thick eight inches (an honest eight, not just a come-on line). It was a joy just to see and appreciate. I could tease the shaft, glans and head with my tongue, just like any cock, but there was more of it to work with. One girlfriend told me she had a boyfriend who measured 12 inches, and she could only suck the head while giving him a hand-job!

But I'm not a one-note Linda. Every penis has its appeal (although a girlfriend once complained to me that her fiancee's unit was less than three inches; the engagement eventually busted up). Give me thick and average and I can be in heaven. I can get him all the way in my mouth. After the requisite licking, kissing and teasing of his cock, I can start sliding it in and out as I suck, going all the way down, in a way I can't with a larger dick.

It's true that I was once taken and face-fucked by a big dick. He rammed it into the back of the throat, while keeping a tight hold on my head and hair. I had no choice but to take that dick all the way. The surprise and the emergence of my latent submissive side were exciting. But I also thought I was going to keep gagging and just pass out. In general, this is bad manners, to say the least.

Big dicks don't always produce the most semen...and you know I am a girl who not only loves to swallow, but loves big loads. My first high-school blowjobs were guys with average dicks...one with a big helmet of a head (ahhhhh...) and the other with a thick shaft and the head a little smaller (yes, I remember them vividly!). But how they came! I really felt as if I was sucking their taut young balls dry. Yes, youth has its benefits.

So size isn't everything in fellatio, but it doesn't hurt. Most of all, give me an appreciative man, who knows he's getting this wonderful gift from me.

Changes

I know. I've been gone.

Since we last visited, I've made some changes in my life. The biggest is that I am no longer playing "cougar."

Don't get my wrong. Parts of it were fun. It was definitely good for my ego to be attractive to younger men. I liked their stamina and their ability to get hard so quickly after coming. I love that strong stream of semen that most young men have. Young, taut skin, washboard abs, muscles and stamina. I had my share of long, thick cocks that stretched me like a virgin. Sweet.

But other things were either turn-offs or got old. In some cases, I was fucking guys half my age. In other words, young enough to be my sons...I tried not to think about that part. I did try to be a good teacher, the older woman initiating the young man into the arts of love in the European way, and in many cases I found willing and grateful pupils. There are women out there thanking me now for the skills their lovers picked up from Linda Sue.

Yet the majority either pretty soon wanted to move on to women their age. I tried not to be jealous, but that green-eyed monster is real. It made me aware that I wasn't 25 any longer. Others wanted a mommy substitute, and I definitely didn't want to play that role.

The thing that started to bother me was when these young bucks complained about my pubic hair and wanted me to shave. I'm proud of my natural red hair down there and it's not as if it is a jungle. It creeped me out that a lover wanted me to look like a prepubescent girl. There were young men who would pull out and masturbate until they came on my belly. This was fun once, because he seemed turned on by it. But it left me feeling unfulfilled, pun intended. I want a man to come in me, and then to feel his penis stay inside me as it became soft, and have him hold me. Their love-making was artless despite my best efforts. I realized that so many young men are porn addicts that they "learn" about sex from videos that show these acts.

No offense to readers who get off on this. But it's not my thing.

Then there was, in most cases, a big cultural and generational divide. I have a job with heavy-duty adult responsibilities, life and death. I like adult things and keep learning and growing. So many of my young lovers acted (and dressed) like adolescents frozen in their teens. They don't read books.

Lately, I've chosen men my age or older. I'm still juggling, but fewer. Two men — one my age, and another one who is ten years older. Both are great lovers (and for those counting, their penises are average length but lovely). And one lover is a woman my age. Jenn is also a natural redhead and my height. To be honest, I have been to a lifestyle club again, so I haven't lost my edge or curiosity. I still love short skirts, garters and stockings. Yes, I'm still a multi-orgasm screamer.

Jenn slowly opened up and told me how she had been brutally raped while working late when some hoods gained entrance to her office. There was nothing sexy about it. No enjoyment and unexpected orgasm. Just cruelty and brutality. It made me question my submissive side and rape fantasies — and I had one scary episode myself that I may tell you about. Anyway, I've tried to set those things aside.

I'm back in country for at least a while. I've grown my hair long, over my shoulders. I think you'd like it. Thanks for all your emails while the blog has been dark. I can't promise to be diligent about posting. Blogging is hard work and I have a fulltime job. And three lovers to keep happy...and to keep me satisfied. Life is good.

P.S., I am looking for some new blogs to link. Ideally, they are real stories like mine, not fantasies. But send me your nominations.

The fluffer

"Jennifer" was a beautiful girl, 5'5, 100 pounds, killer body, strawberry blond hair, the younger sister of a friend. She came from a comfortably affluent family. Deadly normal. This caused her to flee when she was on the verge of beginning her freshman year at the University of Washington.

She drove to Los Angeles, a city she had visited many times before. At first, she crashed with friends and said she was determined to become an actress. After all, she had excelled in theater in high school and everyone told her how good she looked, how she was a natural. The real world was much tougher. Everyone in LA, at least in "the industry," was more beautiful, more connected, richer, thinner. When she finally found an agent, she knew it was too good to be true. And it was. She went to a second-floor walk-up office in a dingy building on Van Nuys Boulevard. There was a job for her, all right, but it was in adult films.

"I should have run away right then," she told me later, "but I didn't."

Why not? Why do any of us do stupid things when we're young? An internal dare. Rebellion. Facing our fears. Convincing ourselves it will lead to something better. "I just wanted to," was all she offered.

Her "audition" was perfunctory. She was told to get on her knees and suck the cock of the "agent," a sweaty fat man with a small penis. And she did, bringing him off quickly. Jennifer had been hooking up since early in high school and was quite proficient. He seemed impressed, and not. "You're gonna have to learn," he said.

Two days later, the man picked up Jen and drove her an address in the Valley, an ordinary suburban house, a little down on its heels. Inside, however, it was a studio for filming adult videos. A dozen people were inside, some dressed (the crew), some not. "This is your new fluffer," the man said to another man she learned was the director. She had never heard the term. It would be her job for the next year. Although "fluffer" is often associated with gay porn, it's also a job in straight adult film. Usually teenage girls, fluffers are there to help the male porn stars get hard for their scenes with the women. Jennifer was 18 but looked younger. She wondered if she would be asked to disrobe. She was comfortable with her body, even an exhibitionist. She was not, at least not at first. As the job was explained to her, she also felt a little let down. Although adult videos were not "Hollywood," she at least assumed she might be featured as an actress. Hell, it couldn't hurt. Other adult stars had crossed over. She might meet important people. But, no. She was just part of the crew. A very special part.

She was lectured by the director and his assistant, a woman: Your job is just to get the guys hard when they can't do it on their own. Never bring him off. It became obvious that the men, even though they were quite handsome, were "props." The women were the stars, and most of them had little patience for male co-stars who couldn't get it up. That's where a fluffer came in. There were three studs that day, each one with a bigger penis than she had ever seen before. She dutifully stimulated two of them during the multiple takes. The third seemed rock hard all the time ("if you have an erection lasting more than four hours..."). That first day, it was "phat" to be there, sucking the cocks of strange men. They were all clean and had great bodies. As far as she could tell, the "plot" was a husband who tries to defend his wife from a gangbang and fails. The female stars ignored her.

In good months, she might work every day, making enough money to get her own place and buy clothes without asking for help from her parents. As far as they knew, she was getting work doing commercials for local television (that way they couldn't look for her). On big shoots, there might be two or even three fluffers. But Jen was the most attractive and skillful. Only once did she get so involved with a stud — and he with her — that she brought him off in her mouth. That led to a hard slap from the director and a black eye that lasted two weeks. She was a beautiful girl, and a few of the studs came after her when shooting was done. She enjoyed being fucked by such skilled lovers, once she learned how to handle their size in her pussy — there was a difference. Somehow she thought the adult industry required regular checks for STDs. Later she learned this was not necessarily true. The money and productions got better as she got a reputation as one of the most skilled fluffers in the business. Her agent took a percentage, of course. Eventually, she was cast in a few videos, always as a teenage cheerleader, babysitter or, in the creepier plots, a daughter who got fucked by "daddy" and his buddies. Truth was, she liked the sex. She liked the scene as some of the women actors warmed to her. When she came on camera, it was usually real.

But this is a sad story. The fluffer did not become even an adult video star. She was not a young woman in charge of her wild side like my friend, Mary Beth. A second-tier actor became her boyfriend and introduced her to cocaine. Unfortunately, she loved it. By the time I found her, she was wandering Hollywood Boulevard (true story) at one a.m., high as a 747, dressed like a cheap prostitute. In fact, that was what she had become. There was an echo of her beauty left, but the life was gone from her eyes and her 22-year-old face looked 40. Her sister had asked for my help. As I was half dragging, half carrying her to my car, a big dude came up. Her pimp. He made a couple of threats before I kicked him in the balls and, as he bent toward me, drove the heel of my hand into his nose. I could have arrested him, but who needed the paperwork and the suspicion of the local cops? I took her back to Seattle. She's been in and out of rehab ever since. That's my fluffer story, gentlemen. Wish it could have been a turn-on without consequences.

A cock in the hand

A reader wants my take on hand jobs. "I'm interested in any story with a big cock, a lot of cum, or just about anything that strikes you. Needless to say, detail would be much appreciated." And, "PS, Have you ever caught a guy masturbating? If so, a story about that would be fantastic as well." You know me. I love to be of service, and serviced.

Hand jobs aren't my kink. Still, there's something wonderful about making out with a guy and feeling his erection through his pants. Then slipping my hand inside his fly and stroking his cock. I've stroked men through their suit slacks in fancy bars, and done it under the table of four-star restaurants with my foot. If it's a new lover it's like (I think I've written before) opening a Christmas present. Cocks are hard, yet their skin is so preternaturally soft. I do love to stroke a cock as he kisses me, or fingers me. I only had one bad experience this way when I reached inside and found a skinny, three-inch penis. Since he was married anyway, I just ended things after the make-out session.

I did a good deal of hand jobs in high school, when I was keeping my virginity by jerking off my boyfriend (and a couple of other dates, too), before I graduated to blow jobs. Those early memories of the first time I felt a cock in my hand are still arousing. Boyfriend came the first time after I ran my hand up and down his penis maybe half a dozen times, leaving a huge stream of semen all over his pants, steering wheel and, of course, my hand. It was the volume and power of an ejaculation that only a seventeen-year-old boy could have. We were both surprised as hell! It was cool, white and sticky, stringy and unlike anything I had ever experienced. I wasn't adventurous enough then to lick it all up, but I did take a little taste off my finger — and I was addicted to semen ever since. After that, he always wanted me to jerk him off, since I was saving my cherry. After I started sucking cock and fucking, the hand job alone lost its allure.

There was one exception. I had a fling with a very well-endowed man. His cock was so thick he couldn't get it inside me. He called himself "Foster" because he claimed his penis was the size of one of those big Aussie beer cans. It wasn't quite that thick, but I just couldn't take him in my little pussy. So I gave him several hand jobs, sometimes as part of fellatio, sometimes just with my hand. His cock was shaped like a missile, with a smaller head than the shaft. His balls held plenty of white stuff and I loved making a mess.

As for catching someone in the act, when I was fourteen I walked in on my brother as he was masturbating. I almost immediately closed the door, but the image was burned in my brain. He was surrounded by porn magazines and frantically running his hand up and down his cock. I was horrified but also a little turned on. I did my own masturbating in my room; more than once my mom threw open the door and gave me a long lecture about how "that" would give me diseases, how "that" was the devil's work. She should have seen her son.

Once I was drunk in college and went back to my boyfriend's place late. We smoked some dope and listened to music. Then ended up fucking a long time on the floor while his room-mate was supposedly passed out on the sofa. But as I was riding my lover I noticed movement, and the roomie was jerking off while watching us. I caught his eye, then he immediately pretended to me asleep. I had a major orgasm, right then, stifling myself in boyfriend's shoulder. Back then I was still too repressed to have invited the room-mate to join in. But as I lay there panting, I looked over and saw that he had come, too. And he was licking his sperm off his hand! By this time, he wasn't even faking sleep. He grinned at me lasciviously. A few days later, we were fucking on the same sofa, while boyfriend was away.

I had to hand it to him.

The limits of kink

Because some of you asked...here's what happened with Chris and me after our visit with his swinger friends. He was very messed up after his cocksucking episode. His usual dry wit and conversation turned into sullenness and long quiet periods staring at nothing. I could sympathize, remembering both the first time a boy had come in my mouth: the surprise, the feel and taste...and recalling the first time a man held my head down and pumped his semen into my mouth. Despite my efforts to draw him out about it, he didn't want to talk.

This from my friend who had been happy to arrange for a "strangers" gangbang (see here and here and here) for Linda Sue, and who reveled in seeing me make love with a woman. He also enjoyed my college tales about my first girl-love, Pam. Plainly the whole goose-gander equation was out of whack.

I never sensed Chris had a limit to his kink, but guys are different. It's one thing to see girls doing each other, maybe even being "bi-curious," as the ads say. Obviously it's another to do the deed in real life. For the rest of the visit, Chris seemed out to prove something. Every time we fucked, he gave it to me as hard as possible, often uncomfortably so. He wouldn't let me go down on him. And I haven't heard from him since he left.

Still, I have this delightful mental image of his expression as he was sucking Andrew's large, thick cock and then faced the moment of truth: ejaculation! Chris was a swallower. I was proud of him. And I think deep down, he liked it. If I were more adventurous, I might go back on my own. But I live on the edge enough.

A very, very bad boy

About an hour after David left, Chad came over. He looked very troubled and earnest. We sat on the sofa and he took his hands in mine and confessed that he had been unfaithful. I still had David's come in my pussy. I wasn't going to blurt this out, of course. The way I keep my pleasure separate from my emotional health (and professional viability) is through stealth, lies and compartments. "You're like a man that way," my ex-husband said. Now Chad was looking very guilty and worried. It was incredibly sweet.

I got down on my knees and nuzzled against his crotch. I felt his penis start to grow down his right leg. "Are you mad at me?" he asked.

"That depends on how you confess," I said. If nothing else, I am very good at interviewing suspects and gaining confessions -- but not this way at work, of course. I looked up at him, then unzipped his slacks and reached into his boxers.

"You have to tell me everything. What was her name?"

He hesitated until I had his cock out in the open air and kissed its head.

"L-l-l-lauren..."

"Mmmmm." I gently rubbed his shaft with two fingers and licked very lightly.

"Did she suck your cock?"

"Yes."

By this time he was completely hard. Chad's cock is an amazing thing. It's too big and long to stick straight up, but it was elevating above the fabric, bouncing toward my mouth. I took him in as far as I could and sucked him. "Is she as good as me?"

"No," he moaned.

"Tell the the truth or I'll stop." I quit even touching him.

"NO!" I was aroused, too. Territorial aroused. I used to be jealous; now I try to channel that impulse into just being territorial, and getting the joy of the voyeur.

I went back to lightly jerking his shaft and licking it. Licking it like a lollypop on the head, up and down the shaft, gently nibbling.

"Did you shower before you came over?"

"Of course."

I punched him in the solar plexus. Not too hard. "You're a bad boy. I can't taste Lauren on your cock. I can't smell her pussy..." Any discomfort he felt went away as his cock, mind of its own, rose up in full glory. I lightly sucked him as I unbuckled his belt, undid the button of the slacks and slid them and his underwear down. He cooperated fully. He was already breathing hard and his balls were tight.

"Did you fuck Lauren?" He admitted he had. Twice the night before.

"Just twice?" Licked the shaft, nibbled at the edge of the head. My warm hand caressed his balls. "Did she like it."

"I think so." Such a modest lad for such a well-endowed one. I made him tell me more. Lauren was 22, a girl his age, but she wasn't intimidated by his size. She took almost all of him inside. She was a moaner, not a screamer. Lauren had never had such a large cock before, or so she said. I just kept the tension going, licking a little, stopping, sucking for awhile, stopping. He was getting very, very aroused relating his adventure. I kept asking for details. What did her pussy look like? Did you try to fuck her in the ass? Swallow or spit?

"Bad boy," I said. "Don't even try to come yet." I gripped the root of his shaft hard. "Does she have big tits?"

"Uhn-huh...no..."

"Oh, you like legs and ass...." It was no use. I felt his long shaft pulse so I went down on him and after the second rotation of my mouth he filled it with tasty semen, yelling in his orgasm. Yelling my name. An essential for a gentleman: Know the name of the woman to whom you are making love at that moment. He came in three strong spurts and I swallowed as fast as I could. Until the last load, which I held in my mouth and rose up to French kiss him, make him share it with me, the come I got instead of young Lauren.

It didn't take long before we were in the bed. I made him lick me until I came -- he was imbibing my pussy juice mixed with David's semen. Then we were fucking. Did I imagine he had picked up some confident new moves with Lauren? Chad fucked me in all sorts of positions, coming twice more, forgetting Lauren at least for awhile. I was happy for him, and relieved that he won't be trying to fall in love with me. I'd been fucked four times in just a few hours, had a stomach full of come. I was tired and happy.

Happy birthday, part two

I was amazed at how things were working out. I had no plan, only a hot hope...and now Chad was fucking Wendy in my bedroom.

It wasn't long before I quietly pushed open the door and slipped inside the room. Neither noticed me. I sat in the chair near the foot of my big bed and watched. My panties were thoroughly soaked as was part of my little black dress. I didn't dare move. If I broke the spell, the magical alignment where everybody had left their inhibitions at the door, the evening might end in disaster.

Chad was on top of Wendy in a classic missionary position that I find very sexy. He raised himself up on his arms to look at her, and they were locked on each other as he fucked her. And, what a fucking. In the ambient light, I could see his huge cock disappearing all the way inside her, then pulling out, then pistoning back inside. Her knees were pulled up, her ankles rested against the backs of his thighs, and she gripped his ass tightly. His tight balls slapped right up on her butt as he reached maximum depth. I didn't know how she could handle that length, but she was loving it. And I mean loving it...moaning, whimpering, giving little screams every few minutes, calling out half-words. He was into it as well...no strong, silent type this young man.

The room smelled of sex. Pussy odor and sweat. I could hear the wet puckery sounds of him entering her, pulling out, going back in. He started riding her higher up and she really went crazy. It was nothing like the way she reacted when I licked her, that slow buildup. I realized she might never have been fucked so well, considering her dead-battery husband and boorish married lover. Oh, if the crowd down at the office could see mousy Wendy now. Chad adjusted, raised her legs over his shoulders. He slid in very slowly, and she gave a deep moan. "Ohmygod!" Then his cock pulled almost all the way back out...quite the sexual athlete here...and slammed all the way in. "Ahhhhhohmygod!!" Again and again. I felt my fingers on the inside of my thigh but made myself wait. No self-gratification. I knew I'd get mine soon.

I wondered what she would think if she knew he was 18 years old. At that moment, she probably wouldn't have cared. They both came in a loud concussion of screams. And then he carefully let her legs down and gently lay on top of her, holding her close, letting his wondercock stay inside her, stroking her hair, whispering her name (I had taught him all this; what a difference from the young guys who first fucked me when I was around that age).

Neither seemed surprised when I slid naked onto the mattress next to them. Both had this glassy look of the sexually happy. The odor of semen and pussy was like fine wine. "Oh..." Wendy managed, and touched my face tenderly. We kind of naturally rearranged ourselves, with Chad climbing off and lying on his back. A long white string of semen followed his penis out of her pussy. His cock was still half hard as I licked their juices off. Then I licked, sucked and nibbled a very happy Wendy, glorying in their mixed juices. She was spent but moaned and rubbed her legs against my shoulders.

It wasn't long before Chad took control and gave me an unusually forceful doggy fucking. I was so dilated and wet that I took more of him than ever before without discomfort. I was so aroused that I had my first orgasm almost immediately. I think Wendy was sucking on my nipples from below...I kinda lost track by that point. The edges of my eyes were exploding colors and my feet and lower legs were burning with orgasm. He could feel my pussy contracting against his cock as he grabbed my ass and fucked me like a wild man. Another orgasm hit me like a bullet out of nowhere...with a happier result. I could hear this explosive scream and realized it was me and I was both floating and tightly impaled in Chad's cock. I fell forward onto Wendy, who cradled me and kissed me. And I fell asleep like some selfish twenty-year-old guy. When I woke up, they were both between my legs licking me, kissing each other...god, it felt good. Later, they brought me a piece of cake and we took turns feeding each other bites.

I was out in the field for a week before I saw Wendy again. She blushed immediately and smiled. "Hope you had a happy birthday, Linda."

Oh, I did.

Happy birthday, part one

I turned 40. The only thing that kept me from being neurotic and depressed about it was the small dinner party I had at my place. The invitee list was small: Chad and Wendy.

We enjoyed martinis and then I cooked while the two of them made conversation. Wendy gave me this knowing smile, as if she figured out I was up to something. But they seemed to get along well -- a good 'tini will help, but as I've said, Chad has social skills well beyond his age. I could hear him getting Wendy to talk passionately about a new book on the Middle East. (One challenge to a dinner like this is that there's so much Wendy and I can't talk about to outsiders).

After dinner, we retired back to my cozy living room and I made sure Chad and Wendy sat on the small sofa. I poured a fine port and sat across from them on my vintage Eames chair. We were about talked down, about to that point in the evening when one starts to thank the hostess and head for the Metro, when Chad leaned over and kissed Wendy, first lightly, then passionately. Her arms went around him and embraced him. I felt a warm, wetness between my legs (I was wearing a little black dress, just to set the mood).

Chad pulled back and Wendy was flushed a bright red.

"I...I...Linda, I should be going..."

I winked at her. "Just let it happen."

And did she. Wendy grabbed Chad's shirt collar and pulled him back again. This time the kissing was serious and pretty soon she had her hands all over him, including down his left leg, where his fine cock was stretching the fabric. I can imagine what she was thinking. I just sat there. Everybody was toasty from the booze, but I didn't want to move too fast and blow the whole thing up. I've opened up Wendy a lot, but she's still a suburban soccer mom with all that baggage. He stroked her face and hair, kissed along her neck and her ears; I had taught him well.

I walked over to the two of them and stroked both their heads. "You guys need to get a room." They looked up, and I nodded toward my bedroom. "It's okay," I continued. "I have some work to catch up on."

Chad stood quickly and led Wendy into the bedroom. Days before, I had talked to Chad and asked him if he would be open to some mischief. He was, of course -- he's a horny 18-year-old! Wendy hadn't been prompted at all, but over time I had told her about threesomes and orgies I had taken part in. Part of her was a little shocked. But most of her was very, very intrigued. I could tell most of all by how horny she was to play with me after I had told these stories.

The two of them went into the bedroom. The door closed. I sat and nursed the port for several minutes before rising and opening the door ever so slightly. Then I went back and sat on the sofa, stretching out my legs, turning off the floor lamp and sipping...and listening.

Wendy is not a major screamer. But it wasn't long before I heard the first one of the night, sharp, primal, exquisite. I tried really hard not to involuntarily squeeze my legs together and grind my pelvis. I was hoping I could join the fun, too...

Younger men, scheming a 3-some, older women

Playing with Chad. Sometimes when he sleeps, I watch him with his lean, young body and his youthful face and I think: God, this is strange. I'm soon to turn 40 and here I am in bed with this...boy. Just a random thought. But when I wake him with a blowjob and see that magnificent cock spring to life, all those adult thoughts go away.

I've never been a deep-throater. I know some men get off on that, but my gag reflex is too sensitive. He seems very happy to have me get about a third of him in my mouth, then lick his shaft all over, then suck his head while I jerk him off with my hand, then use the other one to stroke his balls. He really likes this. If he's fucking me on top, I reach around and stroke his tight sack and in just a few moments he's shaking and moaning and then coming. Love all that come, whether it's in my pussy or my stomach. Older men have their charms, but generating lots of semen isn't one of them.

Chad is a gentle lover and I want to reinforce this with him. He could really hurt a girl. He could drive them off. In fact, he told me about a girl his age who saw his penis and called the whole thing off right there. She was too afraid to have him inside her. I keep trying different positions, but still can't get him all the way inside. Just can't. Oh, but it feels good...at least once we get going. It does hurt at first, every time. It's like I am revirginating. I tilt my pelvis and relax and take more in. I've tried different tilts as he fucks me from behind. Still can't take him all. He's not complaining. My best move is riding him, with me almost up on his belly and my legs trailing behind. That way I can be in total contact, but take as much of him as I can, riding up and back, over and over. I couldn't just sit on him.

I am scheming. What about a threesome with Wendy? Oh, my sweet friend is both fragile and growing more and more adventurous. She is getting horny now that she's really having orgasms and realizing sex can be pleasurable for her. I may broach this.

Readers ask. What's my favorite penis length. I like them all. Honestly -- and I mean this -- what's attached to the cock is what's most important. A man who is: intelligent; giving; communicative; interested in me and the world; can talk about books and ideas, and if I wish, take me out to the symphony dressed to the nines (and enjoy it). Sure, I've played with bad boys, but everybody has their deviant streak. An old lover, a college professor, sometimes bedded university (female) cops with high-school diplomas. As a lover, he must be giving -- must really be into giving me pleasure, especially orally. He must be loving, as in holding me after I come. This is possible in all shapes and sizes. All things considered, I'd take a thick eight-incher (which is well bigger than average, contrary to what you see on the Web). But it often doesn't work that way. Many guys with big cocks think all they have to do is show up. Some of my very best lovers have been average and even smaller, but highly skilled.

Readers ask. They're young men who want to bed older women. The appeal is real: Older women are often more sensual; they're past their "I'm the center of the universe" solipsism of young things; they're open to sexual pleasure. First thing: Don't break their hearts. It's a long way down at our age. Be honest about what you're after. Generally, these women will want "mature" young men -- guys who like women, who are good listeners and communicators, who are smart and read books, who clean up well and can dress better than ghetto hoods. In bed, they want someone who will give pleasure, not just take. Many have been through selfish marriages, with a guy who just humps them. Learn to love giving oral sex to a woman. She can tell if you love it. And she will reward you. Often intellectual guys have only or predominantly had older lovers until their reach their thirties -- the women their age when they are 18 or 25 just aren't interested; but the older women are. Be careful if she's still married; it may be a great match -- she's not going to want to marry you and you can be her boy toy, but make sure she can be discreet, and hubby is at a safe distance. As I say, be gentle and honest. Enjoy!

Foot-long

After twenty years of being sexually active, it was bound to happen.

I met Chad at Politics & Prose, the great independent bookstore in D.C. He's tall, broad-shouldered, with a classically handsome face. I'd seen him before, and the second time we started talking. We continued the talk over a drink. I let him ask me out.

He's 18 and a student. Me? I work for the government. "Really, what department?" The Department of Justice. "Really, do you do?" I change the subject. He's rare for that age cohort: he can talk about books and ideas, wants to know about me. It's not about sports. Anyway...I was attracted to him, but 18? That's old enough to be my son. Scary. He wants to know if I've had children (no). I let him ask me out twice more. On that second date, we went to my place and made out. I let him take off my blouse and suck my nipples...taught him to suck hard. Then I stopped it. I didn't even feel his crotch. I was still ambivalent.

After the third date, we went to my place and started kissing again. This time he really had me going with the kissing, neck kissing and nibbling and working on my breasts. He really had me going. He slipped off my jeans and my panties. Spent a long time kissing my feet, sucking my toes, kissing up the inside of each leg (nice moves for a young man...for any man). About ten seconds into him putting his tongue on my clit, I had a mammoth, screaming orgasm. We hadn't even gotten beyond my cushy living room sofa.

I was still shaking and whimpering as I led him into the bedroom and started to undress him. His slacks and boxers came down together with one firm yank.

He had the biggest cock I've ever seen.

"It's almost twelve inches," he said simply. And he wasn't exaggerating. It was very hard but hung down at an angle by its sheer size as I stroked it and gulped inside. The biggest I had ever taken all the way in was eight inches. I sat on the bed and licked it, shaft to head, cupping those young, tight, sperm-filled balls. He was breathing heavily and moaning. His head was large and prominent, the shaft average. The length...amazing. And, contrary to stereotypes, he's white.

I lay back on the bed, drenching wet inside, but unsure I could handle him. I pulled him on top and gently guided his cock into me. His cockhead made me gasp. Thank God, unlike the men I fucked in college, he didn't try to immediately ram inside me. Slowly, I let him enter me, holding my hands against his stomach. He propped himself on his arms, an angelic smile on his face. OMG, it felt good. I was very filled up, but looking down, he had a good four or five inches still on the outside. This is one of the visual things that really turns me on -- watching a cock go in and out of my pussy. He fucked me at a slow rhythm, and I was seeing this huge shaft go in and out. I tilted my pelvis and raised me legs to take more of him. But when he his my cervix, he could tell from the look on my face. Then it was great...felt it everywhere inside me, felt so filled up. Unlike anything before. He gave me a great fucking and I moaned and came again, then he moaned and pumped all that young come inside me.

Afterward, he told me he had been with only one other woman. Sharon was 40, had had three kids, and loved his size. But she also taught him some moves, including how to fuck smaller women. Go, Sharon. We fucked three more times that night, including me on top riding him from a squatting position which gave me control over how much of him I took in, and doggy. I forget how many times I came. I also can't remember the last time I had so much sperm inside me. Well...actually, I can, but that's another story.

The goodbye fuck

I love juggling multiple lovers, especially when they don't know about each other. It's thrilling. The ultimate fuck you to my sexually repressed upbringing.

So I've got the Lieutenant. And I've got Wendy. Young and strong, fuck me all night. And this dear woman who is so needy for real physical loving. I had a brief fling with an older woman years ago -- it weirded me out because it was clear she was a lesbian looking for a young wife. In Wendy's case, I am the power player. My late-night fear: She might fall in love with me.

Wendy is discovering kink. The other night she came over after being fucked twice. Her married lover had snuck away for a quickie after work. And her husband -- perhaps sensing something new in the sexual time-space continuum -- had also banged her. I had her sit on my face while I tongue-fucked her, tasting the mingled semen of both men. Then I had her come down so I could French kiss her with the delightful concoction. Both fucks had been fast and graceless, but she loved tasting the results from my mouth. We both came violently in a long bout of love-making.

What I really want to talk about is the "goodbye fuck." I think this is exclusively a female phenomenon, but I'd be interested in what readers think.

By "goodbye fuck," I mean when a woman chooses to sleep with a male colleague who is about to move to a new job or assignment in another location. I've done this a couple of times, and the delight comes from a couple of sources. First, you can sexually sample a guy you've had your eye on, but for whatever reason never bedded him. Second, it's a guaranteed one-night stand -- he's leaving -- and yet it's safe, knowable, controllable.

(ADDENDUM: Let me explain more about what I mean when I say "female phenomenon." Guys will generally fuck anything, anytime. Women generally control whether it happens -- and usually it doesn't; think of all the girls and women you wanted to fuck and never had a chance. So to me, in most cases, only the woman has the power of the sexual landscape to bestow a real "goodbye fuck" on a lucky guy. Maybe some incredibly charismatic men can do the same, but I am a little skeptical. Even these guys would have already fucked the woman, if they were attracted and had the sexual power to get what they wanted.)

I gave one goodbye fuck to a professor in graduate school just after I graduated. I knew he had his eye on me and that he liked redheads -- his wife was one. I came by his office, said goodbye and he gave me a hug. We lingered in each other's arms. He kissed me, lightly at first -- and then when I didn't resist, he slipped his tongue between my teeth. We went back to my apartment and fucked twice that afternoon before he had to go home. Quite a thick cock for such a slender, short geeky guy. The next day I left town to begin my training in Virginia.

Another goodbye fuck was with an older male colleague, who was leaving for an overseas posting. We had a drink with some of the gang and he walked me to the Metro station. There we embraced and I kissed him. We had quite a little PDA going that continued into a hotel room and an all-night romp. I let him fuck me in the ass, too. Next day, gone. I know both guys loved it because they were thinking exactly what I was: No strings.

I think about this knowing the LT will be gone soon. He's got to punch his ticket in Afghanistan if he's going to keep rising, and he's eager to get out there. It's that leaving vibe that has his girlfriend eager to get married. Sigh. I can't give him the classic goodbye fuck because we're already screwing several times a week. But I'll give him a farewell he won't forget.

The stranger

I see from the most recent poll that quite a few of you have a secret fantasy to be taken roughly by a stranger. I'll tell you a story I've never told before, and you can decide if it would really be for you. This is definitely not the Harlequin romance "rape" fantasy carried around by some women.

I was 20, naive and stupid, and I hadn't learned how to fight. In other words, I couldn't control a "rough taking" for my own purposes, as I have sometimes done later. It was a typical late spring Saturday night in college, bar-hopping with girlfriends, cockteasing, drinking. I vividly remember everything, right down to what I was wearing: a khaki miniskirt and tight olive-green top, braless. I had a boyfriend at the time, but had gone out with some female friends. We were in one of the bars near campus; it was late and we were flirting with some of the louts from town. They desperately wanted to fuck us, and quietly hated us because they thought we felt we were above them (and we were). Still, there was much laughing, touching, propositioning...my pal Heather was giving each man a kiss after she did a shot of Jager.

I broke off to go pee. The bar had two unisex bathrooms with locks on the doors. I waited for a girl to finish in one and went in, starting to close the door behind me.

I never got that far.

A man was right behind me and pushed me inside, locking the door behind us. I let out a shriek but it was drowned out by the band. He was only a little taller than me, but very muscular and stocky, with skin so black it shone. I barely had noticed him hovering on the edge of our little group out at the bar. He was very drunk and I smelled the beer and cigarettes on his breath as he shoved me against the wall and mashed his mouth against me, pushing a thick, long tongue between my teeth. I flailed my arms ineffectually as he pulled up my top and roughly sucked on my nipples.

I was pinned and knew I was in real trouble, and my mind wasn't really working. Was I being raped? The thought never really came into play. Everything was overwhelmed by this masculine force and the primal insistence on what he wanted. He pushed me hard against the wall as he grabbed at my legs, fondling me under my skirt, getting big fingers under my panties.

Then I was spun hard toward the sink, barely reaching out to grab on before I ended up on the floor. I stared at the dirty porcelain as I felt my panties being literally ripped off. Then the hem of my miniskirt was pushed up on my hips and I was forced forward. His strong legs spread me almost like a cop ready to perform a frisk -- but that wasn't what he was about. A voice in my head: "You're going to get fucked..." And then, over the music, he yelled the exact words, adding some choice misogynistic terms.

He stood close behind me. Then there was a sudden, searing pain in my pussy. I didn't even have time to feel his cock about to enter me. The air was knocked out of me and I felt my pussy walls straining to fit him. I wasn't even very wet at that moment -- and I was wet almost all the time back in those days. It took several strokes before the lubrication made it easier, but he was hung and fucked like a thug. Hard and fast and like I wasn't even there. I was bent forward, heaving out with every stroke, but his strong grip was on my hips and there was always another "in" stroke coming. Sometimes it went painfully up to my cervix. I was completely in his control. I felt like his cock was so thick it would split me, a feeling that only gradually eased as I got dripping wet and my pussy changed to accommodate such a big one. I looked down and saw his pants at his ankles, undulating on the floor to his movements inside me.

I hung onto the edges of the sink and looked up to see my face, grimacing with each pounding of his shaft. Behind me, he looked smug and angry as he fucked me standing up, his mouth half open, grinning when he saw me watching us. My little skirt was hiked high and the black of his hands were amazing in contrast to the peaches-and-cream paleness of my ass. I had a little orgasm in spite of myself, which just made him fuck me more roughly.

Just as the band finished the set the room was silent enough for me to hear him grunt loudly, and I felt several spurts of semen going deep into me. Thank God I was on the pill. He kept fucking me, slower now, for several minutes, and I think he even came again. By this time my forehead was down on my arm, my eyes closed. I didn't want to look.

He pulled out as roughly as he had entered. As he pulled up his pants, I got a look at his big cock, with little ridges and swirls of our white juices on it. Even deflating, it was the biggest one I had seen so far. Then he opened the door, showing me still proned out over the sink, my legs opened, cum starting to run down my leg. I could hear his buddies applauding and knew they were debating whether to come in and take turns. Somehow I got enough strength to slam the door and lock it. I sat on the toilet and watched his semen dribble out. I didn't know how I was supposed to feel. Angry? Guilty? I mostly felt numb, and very sore. Later, as I walked back to my dorm -- my ripped panties gone, he took them as a trophy -- he kept dribbling out of me, down my shaking legs.

I was raped then and now I'd cut his balls off with a combat knife. But I'd be a liar if I didn't admit to looking back on that encounter and feeling a little aroused by the memory. People are weird that way. And as some readers have told me, I do have a latent submissive side.

Complications

I wish I could give you boys (and curious girls) a porno style ending to the Wendy saga, but real life doesn't work out that way.

After I brought her off, we went in my bedroom and I held her. She really seemed to love that. It's something many men just can't bring themselves to do. At some point, I took her hand and placed it on my breast while I kissed her. Then I put her hand down between my legs. My pussy was sopping wet, and she started to gently finger me while we kissed. I was shaking with arousal, stroking her hair, trying to ease her head in the direction of my crotch.

Suddenly, she jumps up and runs to the bathroom, barely shutting the door. I hear her throwing up, then the flushing of the toilet. We'd each had about one bottle of red wine between us. When she came back out, she looked green around the gills and staggered out to the living room. By the time I got there, she was dressing.

"I just can't, Linda," she said. "It's just not me. We can't ever do this again."

"Okay." I felt pussy juice running down my thigh. In a few minutes, the door closed and Wendy was gone. Another lover who will deny something ever happened between us. Sigh...I loved bringing her off and giving her some sensual lovemaking. She seemed like she needed it. I went back to bed, used my imagination and got myself off. Definitely not as much fun when you're flying solo. But I had Wendy's wonderful scent still on my face.

The next morning my headache was added to by a call from my sister, Amber.

"Justin raped me last night," she said. I wanted to say, How long has it been since you've fucked your husband? But I didn't. I just responded sympathetically and waited.

"He made me do things," Amber said. "He sodomized me!"

My headache was going away in a hurry. There's always been a bit of the voyeur in me. Did he fuck her in the ass or just make her suck him off -- with Amber one wouldn't know. Until she said, "I can barely walk. I don't know if I should go to the doctor..."

I asked her if she was bleeding. She said no. Ah, that neighborhood of Sodom.

"I think you'll be fine," I said. "But you and Justin need to get counseling."

"I've asked him to talk to Pastor Bob."

Great. Pastor Bob sounds like the name of a pedophile hiding inside a judgmental little prick who would tell Justin sex is only justified for making babies, but I'm a cynic. I asked where she was, and she said at home. Where was Justin? In the next room.

"Maybe you need to take (I named my nephews) and go be with mom and dad until things call down."

"I don't want to do that," Amber said. "I just don't know why he's always after me for, you know... It makes me feel so dirty. I just don't want to...I just don't know why he can't keep his hands off me, act like an adult and not an animal?"

I think: Well, maybe because he's a normal horny guy and you're a beautiful young woman -- definitely prettier than me, and with big boobs. It's not that I'm totally unsympathetic -- Justin's dick would definitely hurt getting sis's anal cherry.

Then, "When he...you know...as he was finishing with me...when he..."

"When he came?"

"When he came," she said. "When he came, he called our your name. He screamed and called out your name!"

I was thankful, believe me

The black jeans...I had worn them in place of a skirt to keep myself from trouble...now they were bunched on the floor along with my panties, bra and blouse. The marble of the bathroom vanity was cold against my hips, but I didn't really feel it as I helped him out of his well-tailored slacks, reached into his boxers and freed his hard cock...

But I'm getting ahead of myself.

It was a Thanksgiving party for American ex-pats in Paris, held in a spacious flat of a reporter whose name you know if you are well informed. These are not co-workers, but some old friends from college or grad school. To them, I'm just Linda with the dull government job. There were others I didn't know, including him. It was one of those sparkling, flirty parties. And he acquired me like a predator drone soon after he made his entrance with his wife. She was blond and lithe, with an ice-queen expression. He kept coming back, and finally we were on a sofa together and our legs were touching.

I was getting overheated by then. The attention was nice, and the forbidden fruit thing, and the fact that he was tall, broad-shouldered, with wavy dark hair just starting to get little sleet-streaks of gray. And I hadn't been laid in weeks, since I had left Seattle with a bang. It didn't hurt that he was witty and could talk about interesting things, art and history. And nothing was going to come of it. So I let my leg stay as he consciously rubbed against me. I vaguely smelled pussy arousal, and I suspect he did, too.

Or so I thought when I excused myself to go to the bathroom. But the subconscious slut in me was hoping...and five minutes later the door opens and he stepped inside. I didn't wait for him to give me more than a merry look in his faithless blue eyes. My hands cupped his face and brought it down to mine beginning a long kiss. Tongues danced and he took me full in his arms. I could already feel his cock hard against my belly. He slipped off my blouse and bra, sucking my nipples very hard. They tingled and ached and ran a high-tension power line directly to my clit. I thought I was going to come right then, as I staggered backward with nothing to hold me but his strong hands. I nearly ripped off my jeans and he slipped his hands on my waist, effortlessly lifting me onto the top of the vanity.

"I need a taste," he cooed, dropping down to kiss my pussy, then run his tongue gently up and down my labia.

I couldn't take any more. I frantically undid his belt and let his slacks drop. My hand wrapped around a fat cock, about seven inches long. Why am I such a large-cock magnet? Not complaining...certainly not at that moment. He opened my legs, swung each ankle over his shoulder and started working his cockhead into a pussy re-virginated by lack of fucking. I leaned back into the mirror and gasped as he pushed in. But I was very wet and it didn't take long until he was really in there. The momentary discomfort of being stretched open soon gave way to a very warm, full feeling.

We made our odd position work, hands holding arms as he fucked me, first slowly, working his cock at different angles, my legs splayed wide open. But I wasn't the only one who was mad with lust. He eased my ankles down so we could get close and he really started humping me as I ground my pelvis back at him. Little contractions started coming. He could feel them, he told me, my pussy kissing him, he said.

Suddenly I started coming. I buried my face in his shoulder to muffle my cries. After a few seconds he gasped and moaned and I felt him pulsing inside me. For a long moment, we just held each other tightly. His cock finally slid out of me, covered with milky semen and pussy juice.

He slipped away and I put myself together, returning to the party with a flushed face. The bathroom had a bidet, of course. But I preferred to put my panties and jeans back on. A few minutes later, I felt a big glob of semen fall out of me. My souvenir.

My going-away party, Part I

I am lying naked on a bed with soft, clean sheets. My hands are tied to the headboard. I am wearing a blindfold. Something about the blindfold actually heightens senses other than vision. Opening my eyes only yields blackness. So I close them and feel the mouths sucking my nipples hard, the hands roaming all over me. I am already very wet. My legs are free and I feel hands parting them, raising my knees.

An unfamiliar body. He's very slender and his breath vaguely smells of peppermint as he leans down kissing me, pushing his tongue into my mouth. He lacks any finesse, like a college-boy. And very slim -- I rub one leg up and down him. But I can feel his erection pressing against me, and he's hung. Ohmygod. I can feel him reaching down with one hand, playing with my pussy with the tip of his cock, my juices coating it. Then he starts to push inside.

It hurts and I cry out. "Go slow, babe." He waits for me to adjust my pelvis to take more of him. I feel his head push inside me, and behind it a very thick shaft...I imagine this as one of those cocks that gets bigger beyond the head. Gasp, I gasp, and his breathing is coming hard on my shoulder. Then his head and torso push away; he must be raising himself up on his arms. He uses this purchase to push his cock all the way in. I let out a half-moan, half-scream. I am filled up, the walls of my pussy almost painfully stretched.

I wrap my legs around him. He's so skinny I can go way beyond crossing my ankles. And yet he's got this giant dick, which he proceeds to use on me full throttle. He's fucking me with a hard rhythm, very fast, his ass and pelvis rotating up and down maniacally. Then he slows down and I rest my feet on the backs of his thighs. He pulls way out, then slams inside me, provoking another moan/scream. I open my legs wide and push up my pelvis to await the next move, and he slams in again. Then he pulls almost out, leaving me quivering, unfilled, the walls of my pussy wet and waiting. It's excruciating...waiting, wanting the rhythm of fucking. But he plays me with more skill than I first expected. Again and again, he slow-fucks me.

Then I feel my legs being lifted and I am nearly upended as my feet and ankles go over his muscular shoulders. Now he's going even deeper, hitting my cervis...not comfortable...yet the thickness of him keeps me moaning and groaning. My hands strain at the headboard, wanting to feel his face and chest, grab his gymnastic little ass. But I am helpless to do so, which of course adds to the arousal. I keep getting to the brink of coming and he hits my cervix...my sounds a mix of aroused woman and pain...it all mixes together with a strange, new sensation. He grunts and shakes and I feel his come shooting inside me.

I don't know his name...

Losing my (other) virginity

When I was in my twenties, many men tried to fuck me in the ass. This usually happened in the heat of a passionate, headboard-banging doggie-style fucking. He might start fingering my anus, and then I would feel him pull out and put his cockhead right on the tip of my virgin asshole. I just couldn't do it. I would always say no, then slide forward so he couldn't do it.

Don't get me wrong, I loved it when a more prepared and sophisticated lover would whip out the KY or Astroglide and finger my anus while he licked me or fucked me. He might reach around and do it while I rode him. A couple were dexterous enough have one finger in my anus, another caressing my perineum and a cock inside me. The orgasms were always very intense. My perineum is very sensitive and I love it when a man touches me there. But, still, I was afraid of anal intercourse.

Maybe some of this was my repressed upbringing, but I had always been turned on by breaking those boundaries. I think one element was that I had taken some large cocks, starting with the drunken football player who fucked me at the frat house way back in college. Some of these monsters had made me feel like I was being split open, at first, but usually my pussy relaxed and accommodated them quite nicely, and I loved that filled up feeling. But I knew my anus was not built to expand that way. And I always wanted pleasure, not pain.

I finally crossed the threshold with my future (and later ex) husband. Like the best of my lovers, he was very playful, uninhibited, always horny, inventive and, at just the right times, gentle. He also had what seemed to me a perfect cock: about average length, but with a nicely thick shaft and a beautiful head. It's still the most beautiful cock I've ever seen. At work and at home, I could fantasize about that cock in my ass. We did a lot of buildup, with fingering and rimming. He was on fire from the moment I said, "I want you to fuck me in the ass."

He did his usual long, magical foreplay...lots of kissing, holding, caressing, leg licking...cunnilingus. I had already had one orgasm. I fucked him on top, and he fucked me missionary, then with my legs up under his arms. Finally, I was on my knees, my ass high in the air, my head down on the mattress. He told me how beautiful I looked as he slowly fucked my pussy from behind. He opened the KY and fingered my ass, then slipped in one finger. He finger fucked my anus as he cock-fucked my pussy. He told me what an amazing feeling it was to feel both going in and out. (And he had been very careful to trim his fingernails; hint to you gentlemen). Then he started fucking me with two fingers. It felt good.

Then I felt his cock on my anus and he gently slid it in. It had been well slathered with KY, too. Wow...I could feel it. A very different feeling from a cock in my pussy. I adjusted my pelvis and back, and it felt better. He was all the way in and started to very gently fuck me. I liked it. Liked the fullness, the sense of ultimate surrender. Then it just really started to hurt, and as turned on as I was, I moaned "hurting..." and he pulled out. As I say, he was a gentleman. A hood might have just taken me and fucked me anyway. Would I have liked that or not? Anyway, that was my first time.

About a week later he was fucking me hard from behind, fingering my ass with one KY'd finger -- though he often did this. He was moaning himself, I was screaming...and suddenly I felt his cock slide right into my anus as he came. I couldn't feel him shooting inside me the same way I can when a man comes in my pussy. But it felt very forbidden and nasty and I came again myself. As he often did, he stayed hard and just gently fucked my ass for a few minutes. It felt great. My anal virginity was gone, semen was in my anus and I could hear and feel it sloppily running out as he fucked me.

New horizons were ahead.

Regrets: an incomplete list

What do I regret? It's a tricky question because nearly all my sexual adventures had some good attached. I do regret saying the poll question allowed multiple choice, and then forgot to check that box -- and once the poll voting has begun I can't change anything. The Internet, arrgh.

I regretted it when they fell in love and I just wanted to play. There was the guy whose cherry I popped -- he was so sweet and I was momentarily smitted. Alas, he got a real thing for me. I had to end it. This has happened several times, and my hope is that they can look back fondly. I taught them how to fuck, and they could impress any woman after me. It happened to me, too, falling in love and getting dumped. I don't regret those. Nor do I regret the times I juggled multiple lovers -- oh, sweet!

I helped screw up my marriage, with plenty of help from my ex. The awful truth is, it's hard to maintain the hotness once that wedding ring slips on. Bills have to be paid. Toilet paper has to be changed. Domestic bliss doesn't equal sexual bliss -- there's no wonder I get so many emails from men frustrated that the sex ended after marriage, or kids, and now they can't even get a blowjob from wifey. I've probably sucked a few cocks I shouldn't have -- but it sure felt good at the time.

When I was training in Virginia, some of the women went out in the hinterlands to a real honky tonk, and I let myself, in a tequila haze, be picked up by this back-woodsy good-ole-boy. We went back to his trailer full of guns -- no shit -- and he fucked me with abandon, my legs up over his shoulder. He was very masterful, very full of man smell, and had a great cock. The next morning he was off to work at 5 and I was stuck there. Had to call a girlfriend to pick me up. Oh, but I loved the moment that big cock started working its way into my little pussy. Still...bad judgment.

I regret a couple of marriages I strained or helped break up. But I have this thing for the forbidden fruit, for the rush of the dangerous. What can I say?

The joy of a younger man

It's been awhile since I had a chance to talk with my friend Kathleen, so we caught up over wine this weekend. As you'll recall, Kathleen got involved with the young stud I had a steamy affair with last year. I introduced them in a wild evening that culminated with the three of us in bed.

Kathleen is a pretty brunette in her forties and had been in a loveless, sexless marriage for a long time. She also wasn't all that sexually experienced, but she was curious and had a spark in her eye. She and Mike the Stud took to each other and it gave me the chance to make an easy exit. I had been concerned that he would kick her to the curb and hurt her. So far that hasn't happened. So here's the debrief, in Kathleen words, paraphrased and direct-quoted by me.

"The biggest change for me is the frequency of sex. My ex-husband might get drunk and climb on top of me once or twice a year, hump me for two minutes and fall asleep. Mike is voracious. He spends a lot of time at my place, and it's not unusual to be fucked three times in a night, on a work night. And we're not talking about two minutes. He has great control and fucks me for a long time. We do every conceivable position -- stuff I had never tried before -- but, as you know Linda, he loves doggie...

"He's the first man I ever did anal with. It was out of the question with my ex, and before him I had only two boyfriends, one in college and one when I was starting out at work. Neither tried it. Mike likes to fuck me in the ass. He's got a big cock -- you remember -- but I really love the way he fills me up. I've had three children and don't know if that makes a difference. I could barely feel my ex. Mike, oh, I feel Mike. It took me some time to learn how to relax and go with it in my ass. He can't get it all the way in, but it doesn't hurt.

"He likes it rough, likes to play tie-up and stuff like that. I can slow him down. Sometimes I just push against his belly to slow him down, and sometimes I squeeze his balls to get his attention. I'm not going to let the balance swing too far. But he can also give me just a great regular fuck. I'd never had anything like it. I've learned to be a good cocksucker, and oh god does he come. It's taken me time to learn to swallow it. Thick, smelly, nasty! I had next to no experience in that. He loves my breasts, loves to have me sit on his belly and dangle them in front of his face while he sucks my nipples hard for what seems like an hour. It drives me absolutely nuts. To have this handsome young man find me attractive is a huge ego boost.

"He still talks about you sometimes. He loves the way you could come in multiple orgasms. I'm not that way. I heat up slow -- I've made him learn to be patient with cunnilingus and with me riding him -- and then I have a big orgasm. But I've also learned to do a lot of moaning and stuff for him as he fucks me after I've come. Don't get me wrong, it still feels great...I'm just not going to have another orgasm that night. But it feels great...

"He's taught me kink. There was the time in the bar where he made me go down on him while you watched. He likes public sex. He's fucked me in an alley once with people walking by on the street not twenty feet away. When we go out he likes it if I dress provocatively, showing off my breasts. He likes it when men notice me, and I do, too. Sometimes he ties me up and puts on a blindfold and we play games. He says he wants to bring in some friends and blindfold me and go from there. I'm not sure I'm ready for that...yet."

The cock I had to have...the aftermath

My brother-in-law fucked me like a dog, like the little bitch I am. He fucked me the same morning he had fucked my sister. It was an animal rough elemental beautiful thing, and all my educated, feminist inclinations proved no defense. Afterwards, I fell into a deep sleep. When I awoke, Chris was standing by the bed. He was taking off his shirt.

I realized Justin had left and the front door was unlocked. Chris had let himself. The bedroom smelled unashamedly of sex, of semen and pussy juice and sweat. Chris pulled the sheet back and I was still completely naked. I tried to retrieve the sheet, but he tossed it onto the floor.

"What have you been doing, Linda? Still getting paybacks on me?" His voice had a strange lilt. He slipped off his pants and his dick was rock hard. He said, "You are such a little slut."

I didn't know what to expect next. He came to the foot of the bed and roughly pulled me toward him. He dropped to his knees and opened my legs. I tried half-heartedly to pull away, but he was having none of it. I was ashamed. I was newly aroused. He hiked my legs up.

"What have we here?" I could only see the top of his head, his sexy wave dark hair. But my pussy was still tingling and I could feel how wet it was. "So sticky," he said. "Your pussy lips are swollen. My god...what's this...?" I felt his tongue on the inside of my thighs, then on the sensitive area between my pussy and my anus.

"Ohhhhhh."

"Tastes like you've been fucking another man."

He was licking me, tasting my juices...and Justin's sperm.

"Did he have a big cock, Linda? Your pussy is so swollen. What a workout it's had." He darted his tongue inside me and I shuddered. "Don't lie. I can tell."

"Yessssss. Ohhhhhhh..."

His face was buried deep in my pussy and he tongue-fucked me, then started sucking hard. It was an amazing feeling and I was bucking and wiggling as my lover sucked out another man's come.

"You've been so bad." He stopped talking and started licking in earnest, making soft circles on my clit and then licking me harder the length of my pussy...then tracing his tongue around my labia...every sensation was acute and different. I could feel a new orgasm building in me. The contractions were apparently forcing out more semen.

"You little whore. Look at all the come inside you." I felt and heard him lapping it up and swallowing it.

"Did he have a big cock?"

"Yes," I whimpered.

"Bigger than me?"

"No, babe," I lied.

"Mmmmmmmmmmm," That tongue wouldn't stop. It was totally connected to me, running through my body like an electrical charge. My inner thighs were involuntarily twitching and I was starting to moan loudly.

He pulled back. My hands reached out to keep him there but he was out of range. Then he was on top of me, his cock easily slipping into the pussy that Justin had stretched to its limits. His smell and the taut muscles on his chest... Now Chris fucked me like a madman, looking down on me with a smile, whispering what a slut I was. I grabbed his butt and held it as he pistoned into me. We both came with sudden, convulsive cries. My pussy was sore and tingly for the next two days.