The brother-in-law saga generated plenty of comments. Some of you think I am quite a slut, capable of anything...
I am capable of a lot. You know I am a junkie for the new, the thrilling, the sexual. I am also brutally honest with you, dear reader, because we don't have to see each other every day.
Some readers admitted to a fetish about adultery. It's with all of us, whether the poleax in the middle when we discover a lover has been unfaithful, the illicit thrill of getting away with it, or the secret arousal that comes from imagining the act that left us devastated.
I've felt all three.
Believe it or not, I married a man I thought was the love of my life. But the sex trickled off once we were married and then stopped altogether. Then I found that he was fucking his young assistant. I had a hole in my middle. I fell apart. But I was also wildly aroused, especially when I followed him and saw that the love interest was an 21-year-old physical copy of me. We fought and separated.
My husband's best friend Ted, a Republican family values type, was quick to get a radar lock on my emotional state. Talks led to hugs led to...a revenge fuck. I was wild with anger, fear, grief, but I knew exactly what I was doing. At one point, I arranged for Ted to be fucking me in our marriage bed when my husband made one of his unannounced visits home "to pick up his clothes."
My husband was hysterical when he found us, Ted on top, my legs wrapped around him. He could hear me screaming in pleasure as he snuck up the stairs. Ted never even lost his erection. He just fucked me a couple more strokes, dismounted, dressed and left. I pulled up the sheets, laughed, screamed, cried. It was a bad scene, but I made a vow.
I vowed I would never be without sex.
I need it at the core of my soul -- and I realize that sets me apart from many other people. I've fucked a few other married men. I have no regrets. It's not my problem if their wives can't keep them satisfied, or lose interest in sex. Monogamy is overrated and perhaps impossible for highly sexual people. The only question is what polite lies we use to cover our tracks. I know of several upright soccer moms who have played around, but in conversations are oh-so-judgmental about adultery.
As for Justin, I'm not interested in him in real life. He and Amber made their choices. I made mine.
4 comments:
Linda Sue,
I enjoy your honesty and your courage to share honestly.
I will not judge you. I may share my opinion about things, but I wouldn't never even consider opionating something hurtful. I already enjoy your passion, and I'd be hard pressed not to thrill with your experiences that you share.
My, girl, you have quite the passion.
Blessings,
Nawty
You go girl. Americans are hypocrites. Europeans have a much more realistic view of relationships. And I'm with you: I will never give up sex. So no dead batteries need apply!
Hmm..
First off, since this is the first time I've commented here, I'd like to say that I enjoy your stories. They're enthralling, and I look forward to reading more.
There are some things from your post that I felt compelled to discuss. I apologize if some of the thoughts don't flow well. There's just a lot to comment on.
I hope you don't read my disagreements with your views as casting judgment on you.. I'm expressing my own thoughts and providing a different perspective, especially because they ARE different from yours. And it goes without saying that you are most definitely free to disagree with me!
I really do have issues with adultery, and participating in someone else's adulterous behaviors (unless it was an open polygamous relationship, but then "adultery" wouldn't have a place there). My view is that it's not even about the sex anymore - it's about respecting the person being cheated on, and how they would feel if and when they find out.
We can't please everyone and we must live our own lives, but at the end of the day our actions DO affect those around us. If I refused to have sex with a married man, perhaps he'd probably find someone else to fuck. But on principle, I wouldn't go along and contribute to his lack of honesty with his wife, because the dishonesty will only become cyclical.. and the great sex would only be a positive reinforcement for this dishonest behavior.
I read in one of your posts about your experience of parting ways with your ex-husband, infidelity being the spark that ignited the divorce. But you also said that the separation resulted in reasons far deeper than that, much of it having to do with the inability to be open with one another about certain issues. You had also hinted at the possibility of working it out with him if he came up clean with the issues eating away at him - if the two of you were able to connect at that level again.
And that is exactly why I don't feel adultery should be a way of manifesting such unhappiness. There are healthier and more constructive means to solve relationship problems.
Here is the only time in this comment where I will cast judgment: relationships may be complicated, but it's how they're dealt with that shows character.. and cheating is definitely not a problem solving strategy to be proud of. It's awful that your ex-husband had cheated instead of coming clean and trying to express himself.
Also: "I know of several upright soccer moms who have played around, but in conversations are oh-so-judgmental about adultery."
That doesn't make adultery acceptable - it only makes these women hypocrites.. hypocrites who aren't even honest with themselves about what will make them happy.
It goes without saying that there are plenty of unhappy marriages where people's priorities are to stay married regardless of how unhappy they are..
Everyone just wants to be happy, don't they? And they seem to look for it in all the wrong places. It's unfortunate, however, that most people will never reach a level of awareness of themselves, will never get to know themselves well enough to understand their own needs and meet them appropriately.
So anyway, after all that, I must say all the power to you for liberating yourself, and realizing that you will never ever go without sex! All the best.
- K
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