Women talk about sex I

Yes, we do. You men just don't know it. We talk about sex at work, in the gym, over drinks and dinner, driving in the car together. Here's a sampling of what I've picked up: Heather has had 38 lovers. As she's gotten older, she feels chagrin about so many. She claims she had a guy with a 12-inch cock once. "What did it feel like?" I asked. "Different. It hurt at first." Her favorite lover was average sized but thick. She loves his cock, can't get enough of it, loves to suck it. The problem: She can't stand to swallow. My suggestion was that she suck him off after he had come inside her and then spit it out on him if need be. Problem solved. Heather's average-sized lover is a happy man.

Jennifer doesn't suck cock or let her lovers go down on her. I don't get this, but she is adamant and quickly retreats into a defensive silence. Is she afraid of losing control if he licks her? Did she learn "it's nasty down there, that's where you pee...," as my mother told me? I can't figure it out. Beautiful girl. Sad.

Amber (not my sister) is married to a man who fucks her, missionary style, once every ten days. She counts it. Hates it. He comes in about two minutes, then is off to his man cave to watch "motor sports." She stays with him for the children. About two years ago, she started falling in with married men and has affairs. "It's the best sex since college," she tells me, "and they don't want to marry me or be in a relationship. It's just about the sex." She loves being given cunnilingus again, taken from behind and fucked in the ass.

The anal thing was very difficult for Steph. Her boyfriend was after it and she was afraid of the pain. It got to where she wouldn't let him fuck her doggy-style because she was afraid he'd try to take her sweet ass cherry. I talked her through teaching him about her concerns and trying things such as ass-fucking her with one finger while he was fucking her pussy with his dick (she liked it). We talked about positioning her pelvis and having him go very slowly. I learned the sweet surrender over time and now adore it. Well, she gave it a try and it didn't hurt. But she didn't like it. In my experience, only a small percentage of women like being fucked anally. More want it as a one-time novelty or because of the "forbidden fruit" nature. "My boyfriend/husband wants anal sex" is a big conversation topic.

I'll tell more later. Meanwhile, I've been taking the virgin to museums, gallery openings and bookstores — not bars — to let him work on pickups. So far, slow going.

A good angry fuck

I've been out of country and of course my lovers don't understand. This is particularly true of the (recent) virgin. How can somebody who works for the Department of Agriculture be out of pocket and not even reachable by email? Of course, I can't tell him the truth.

He has been watching Homeland and the series kind of creeps me out. I am definitely not Carrie. Her tradecraft is totally unrealistic and she'd be drummed out of the agency in a heartbeat in real life. Still, it makes me uncomfortable. The virgin can tell. I would like to spend the night with Claire Danes.

Anyhoo, the virgin was disappointingly faithful So when we got back together, he game me a good, long angry fucking. I think I came about a dozen times. He doesn't think I have been faithful to him, but the truth is that I didn't get laid the whole time. Hence, my dozen orgasms as he slammed his young cock into me. Afterwards, while he slept, I looked at him and couldn't believe how young he is. Young enough to be my son. But I have taught him how to fuck. Later, he licked me for about an hour until I was quivering and my throat was sore from screaming.

I've got to take him out and teach him how to pick up girls...

Fast learner

The virgin loves sex. Like most young men, I've had to break him of some bad habits he's learned from seeing porn on the Internet. It made me glad to find this site by Cindy Gallop (I bet she does). The New York Times also did an article in the Style section about this cougar. I'm doing my modest part.

The good: He's very eager to learn. So as his stamina has increased, I've taught him tricks such as "riding high" in the missionary position, which lets him apply more pressure on a woman's clitoris. And to swivel his hips when he puts my ankles over his shoulders or takes me from behind. He's become very good at cunnilingus and I reward him with feather blowjobs that make him get very loud. He's a legs man who loves for me to wrap mine around him and run them up and down his back and the backs of his legs. I've taught him how to suck my nipples (hard) while cautioning him that not every woman likes that.

We can go five times in a night. He's very sweet and loving, so teaching him not to pull out immediately and to hold me is easy. And the come...OMG. He's got the strongest stream I've ever encountered and can deliver a big load down my throat even after he's come in my a couple of times. He likes women, a big asset. He's smart and funny.

We fucked most of last weekend. Then I had a Sunday date with another man in my life, who gave me yet more good sex. Monday morning, I was pooped and (nicely) sore.

The not-so-good: I've already had the "Don't fall in love with me talk" and he says he's ok with that. But I'm not sure his heart with hear his intellect. So this may come to tears. In the meantime, I am trying to up his social skills and (hidden) charm so he can leave the sex nest and find women his age. It will be tough. When I was that age, I probably wouldn't have been interested in him. But I was a stupid girl, as some are, taken in by shallow things. And plenty of young studs are lousy lovers. In the meantime, we'll keep going.

With a cherry on top

Girl walks into a bar...

I was in one of my favorite watering holes not far from DuPont Circle, a muggy D.C. night, wearing shorts and a light top, no bra. After nursing a martini, I noticed a young man drinking a beer and reading a book. It was one of Arthur Link's books on Woodrow Wilson. That got my interest. A man who reads! And one of our finest historians! So I took the initiative and soon we were talking about the Progressive Era. He was smart and shy, tall with wavy dark hair.

Nothing happened.

Two weeks later, I happened by the same place. This time I was dressed for work. He was still reading Link. We swapped stories, mine sanitized for civilian consumption. He's in grad school, which brought back plenty of grad-school memories for me (and lots of grad-school fucking, which I didn't get into). Finally, I asked him if he wanted to go back to his place for another drink and we went. He was either one of the shyest men I had ever met or he was gay, but from the way he had been appreciatively noticing my body from the first, I took a chance on the former.

In his small apartment, modestly furnished but filled with good books, we sat on the sofa talking for a couple of hours before he took my hand and held it, just that. His hand was strong and warm. I was very wet. That "I'm going to get fucked" sense was apparent. So I took the initiative and kissed him. Pretty soon, we were making out. He liked kissing, which was a good sign. His cock was punching against the fabric of his slacks and I stroked it without pulling it out.

I led him back to his bedroom and we both fell into his small, unmade bed. Pretty soon, we were naked. He gave me an exquisite fingering while I fondled his penis: average size but with a thick shaft and a prominent, big head. I mounted him and guided his cock inside me, getting that nice, filled feeling. He put his warm hands on my hips and I started riding him.

"Oh!"

Yes, I could feel him coming in me. It had taken all of thirty seconds.

So I just rocked on top and got a nice little orgasm, then lay in his arms. He was chagrined, apologizing. His poor penis was totally flaccid, covered with our mingled juices. He actually batted it back and forth, trying to make it erect again. "Don't hurt it," I said and just stroked his chest and enjoyed the closeness. Men have such a difficult time sometimes...

Of course I wasn't going to leave things at that. Pretty soon, I took him in my mouth and he was hard again. Then I put him inside me and we fucked for several minutes this time, and I had a big screamer that left me totally wrung out. All the time, he was so gentle and caring in his love-making, even if it wasn't an athletic hour-long fucking in every position. Later, he went down on me and it was quite fine. I ran my fingers through his wavy hair as he gave me another orgasm.

Later, when we were talking, I learned that he was a virgin. And nineteen. So, there you go, Linda Sue. This cougar thing has gone too far. He's young enough to be my son. And, sure, I'm a little smug having gotten his cherry. If we play so more I'll teach him moves that women later in his life will thank me for. The danger, of course, is that he'll fall in love with me.

Cheap LA whore

Long-distance relationships are always fraught, the sexual tension and release explosive, and you don't know the person in the same way as if you were in the same city dating every day. Still, I met a man once who made me abandon my caution.

I still remember when we both had business in Los Angeles, and of course I couldn't be truthful to him about what my real business there was. We shared a room at a hotel near LAX that had once been top-of-the-line but was just on the edge of shabby. After pulling off the bedspread, on which ultraviolet would expose countless semen stains of strangers, we were naked on clean, soft sheets. Just the kissing and feel of our bodies totally touching from head to toe had me about to come. Which I did when he climbed on top and fucked me, first in missionary, then with my legs scissored in front of his chest (weird, different feeling!), him leaning close and pinioning my legs with his arms (knees at elbows) and then a long big nasty with my legs over his shoulders as he thrust into me while turning his head to kiss my ankles. Whenever I could, I would look down to see his cock going into me, one of my biggest visual turn-ons.

"I'm a cheap LA whore," I teased, an indeed I was wearing sheer black stockings and garter and being impaled in a crappy hotel room. He wouldn't go there. "You are not," he said, telling me how attractive and wonderful I was. I joked, but perhaps there was something behind the words and perhaps he sensed it.

Yes, I am a slut and must be tough in my professional life. But I had really fallen for this man. He was smart and kind, cleaned up well, had a stimulating range of interests and could always make me laugh with a very dry sense of humor. I had that most dangerous feeling a woman can have: A vision for us. (And maybe some men are as vulnerable). Yet he had been hurt very badly in his recently ended marriage and was wary (even though he never gave me an angry revenge fuck against the ex — he spoke kindly of her). The sex was great and I went with it. But 'though slut that I am, I wanted more. I didn't want to be just his transitional lover.

In bed, we talked until his cock was recovered, and then I worked my way down his chest, kissing his body and rubbing my pert breasts and nipples against him. Stationed between his legs, I licked and sucked him for half an hour until he had another big orgasm. He had the strongest stream of come of any lover I'd had, and even with the second orgasm I got a nice treat.

Then he gave me a working over: Long time kissing and fondling and sucking my breasts. Then I swear he played my pussy for an hour, bringing me right to the edge and pulling back, over and over. At one point, he was lightly rubbing my perineum with one finger while (I learned later) using two fingers to make a "U" motion at the bottom of my pussy, all while tongue-worshipping me. All I could manage was a moan of "What are you doooooing?" before I exploded. It was the most amazing feeling.

We fucked five more times over the next 15 hours before we got on our planes and went different directions. He got married two years later. I won't say/admit it broke my heart. The sex was great and maybe we got the best either had to give at that time.

Where I've fucked...

...On a picnic table in a state park, with a wide sweeping meadow around us and the sky cobalt blue over my head. No splinters in my butt, thank goodness.

...In a compartment of a train (more than once). The gentle rocking motion was very sensual. One lover fingered me to a barely-suppressed orgasm on a half-empty coach car on Amtrak between San Diego and LA. Another was fingering me on the subway in New York and the Metro in Paris. I'm sure people noticed.

...On a rich lover's private jet (no government planes, big no-no). Never did the Mile High Club on an airliner.

...On a sailboat, more than once. When you're a sweet young thing it's amazing how many times you are asked to "help crew" a sailboat. (Sorry guys).

...In the back of a van. I was too long-legged to fuck in a car, although I've given many a blowjob in cars. One lover licked my pussy in his wife's mommyvan — Bad Girl, Bad Girl...

...Against the wall and on the sink of several restrooms in restaurants and bars.

...In several jacuzzis and pools.

...On the beach, careful not to let sand get on our privates. It was night in Santa Monica. I was young.

...In my office, once, very bad judgment but I didn't get caught.

...In a professor's office. I realized a couple of guys in a nearby building had been watching us.

...On the lawn of a prominent national monument. I had on a miniskirt and no panties. Unzipped him, his cock sprung out and I sat down ;-)

...In my parents' bed.

...In the back of an SUV in a blizzard.

...A ski lodge. I'm a bad skier. Better with the sex moves.

...Outside, against the wall of a building, in an alley, him holding me up.

What are some of your unusual sex-spot experiences?

Cunnilingus Avoidance Syndrome

This summary is not available. Please click here to view the post.

No...

...I wasn't in Colombia. ;-)

Is oral sex...sex?

NOTE: A very nice person found my old Fellatrices posts somewhere out there in the server universe. Here's one from 2007. Enjoy!

Here's a post for the ladies, and for discerning gentlemen who have had "tell me about your sex life" conversations with their lovers.

Do you count blowjob-only encounters among your lovers?

I've had 31 lovers -- men with whom I have had intercourse. Ah, but I've had another ten encounters that were only oral sex, including two with women. Shouldn't those be considered lovers, too? Probably. But I often put them in a separate category. And I loved each one, after my fashion...

Yes, I remember Monica and Bill and "oral sex isn't really sex." It's definitely sex. But to me the random blowjob, whether in a relationship that goes nowhere or, deliciously, involving a stranger, isn't on the same plane as the nine-course meal that is a complete sexual relationship. In rare instances, it also can serve as a little denial pill: I didn't really fuck that creep!

Yet this snack is singularly tasty, memorable and I wouldn't pass it up.

I didn't pass it up on the train in France, when the young, handsome German in the next seat started caressing my leg, then working fingers up into my panties and finally bringing me to a barely muffled orgasm while the train shot along through the night. I returned the favor by unzipping his jeans, pulling out his cock and starting what I intended as a hand-job. But it just felt so damned good that I had to taste. I sucked him slowly as we passed through the enchanted European night. He clawed my back as he shot his semen into my mouth.

I never knew his name -- my only such encounter.

I sucked off two boyfriends before I lost my virginity. I have sucked off a couple of co-workers and, when I was young and stupid, a boss on a road trip. The blowjob is a wonderful, all-purpose encounter that can lead to more, or lead to nothing more. And that can be enough, just right. I've brought off a man in my mouth with fantasies of a future...only to have him never call me again.

Only once did I get the same in return. A married man I had been flirting with came by for drinks, and things got hot very fast. I was going to suck him, but he wouldn't let me. Instead, he lay me down on the bed, hiked up my short skirt, slowly worked his tongue inside my panties before sliding them down. Then he licked me into one of the most intense orgasms of my life. He never fucked me. We never got together. But...what a gentlemen.

So what is it ladies...do you count oral-only encounters as regular lovers, or something less, or, something more?

That was a mouthful

I believe this was one of the stories I told on the now lost blog, The Fellatrices:

I was involved in a long-distance relationship with a man who lived in the Bay Area. The sex was always unbelievable, as is often the case when you don't live in the same city. We had all sorts of adventures, including public sex where he fucked me on a picnic table in a (we thought) deserted part of a state park. He adored natural redheads.

Once I gave him a challenge: Could he go for two weeks between our visits without masturbating, much less having sex with another woman (he denied there was one, but you never know)? If he could, I'd give him the glory cock-sucking of his young life. Now, this man had the strongest stream of semen of anybody I'd ever gone down on. So if he could do this, it would be pretty amazing.

He agreed to try.

Over the next two weeks, we'd have steamy conversations on the phone. I'd always ask if he was sticking to his promise. He claimed he was, with difficulty. It wasn't easy considering sometimes I'd finger myself and bring myself off while on the phone with him. I also taped myself masturbating, complete with detailed description of what I was doing and then my usual loud orgasm — and I FedEx'd the tape to him.

I met him at the airport wearing a short skirt and a thong. I thought he was going to put me up against the wall right there and fuck me. He was flushed with horniness and Dreaded Orgasm Buildup, as I called it. Back at his placed, he covered me with kisses while he stripped me down to nothing but my black pumps. He laid me down on his futon and proceeded to give me a long missionary fucking. "Dig your heels into my back," he ordered, and I did. Between my own orgasms, I gasped, "Don't you dare come in my. That sperm belongs to my mouth!" But he had superb control, even able to withstand my trademark pussy oscillation move that usually brings guys off very fast. (I didn't use it that night, but let him fuck me playing the submissive, looking forward to my "reward").

After this workout — I'd say at least half an hour — he dismounted and lay on his back. I started kissing him and running my breasts and nipples down his chest.

"Have you been a good boy?" I asked. "No coming without me?"

He swore that he had, but I could tell from his voice that he was desperate to come. I wanted to really take my time, but being a greedy little slut I couldn't help myself. Pretty soon, I had his cock in my mouth and I was moving up and down on him, sucking hard. He screamed himself as the first spurt filled — and I do mean filled — my mouth. It was a gusher, reaching not just the back of my mouth but my throat. I had tried to prepare myself, but this was a huge amount of semen! I swallowed as fast as I could, breathing though my nose, as a second, third and, rare in my experience, fourth spurt came. He was moaning and grasping my hands, his pelvis was shaking.

I just kept swallowing, feeling his thick semen coat my throat and fill up my stomach. He had indeed kept his words, and said it was the best orgasm of his life. We fucked four more times that night, but the first come was the best.

Guest post: Walk on the wild side

EDITOR'S NOTE: Male and female readers tell me their stories. Often they don't want them shared. When they do, and I think readers might enjoy them, I put them on the site. So, here's one from a guy. Enjoy, and keep the letters coming. All I ask is that they be true, not fantasies. — Linda Sue


I don't look kinky. I look a guy who would never do such things. That's my secret, and that's my appeal. It doesn't hurt that I'm over six feet tall, have an in-shape body and dress like the successful Wallstreeter that I am. I'm in my late 30's but look much younger (everyone says it but it really is true.) I've never had issues finding sexual partners - be it women or men. My numbers skew heavily in favor of women (100+) and only a handful of men (5). I have had a hard time finding female partners as willing as I am to push the boundaries; the few bi/gay men I've experienced seemed more than comfortable with my propensity for kink. (Please note - there are plenty of women I've been with that challenge this statement - I am speaking generally of course.)

Using that logic - I expect you are wondering why I haven't had more experiences with men? Sexuality is a tricky concept and mine is no exception. I basically identify as a straight man. I love women - love the female form in every way - love fucking and sucking every conceivable part of a woman. My male partners have always just satisfied a curiosity or fulfilled a sexual experience - never crossing into the realm of emotional that can arise with women.

Living in NYC - I tend to mainly play with women there, leaving the road for my same sex dalliances. I like the discreet nature of the road for this and there is the added benefit it is just so much easier to find a male partner willing to engage in casual sex. For guys curious - I'd recommend manhunt or grindr; google it - very easy and very effective. As men are an occasional thing for me - I'm very picky: I like a tall, masculine, athletic man. This last trip I found out that being hung doesn't hurt as well.

This brings us to MLK weekend and my trip to DC. I had begun chatting with a guy online via manhunt and arranged a late drink at a local gay bar in DC on Friday night. The bar was trendy and mid 30s. We had a few martinis and quickly figured out we were attracted to each other. He was late 20's - dark hair, 6 feet +, swimmers build, and very good looking. He seemed like me but only gay identified - he had a good job and seem very interested in the fact I had limited experience with men. A little disclaimer - my same-sex prior to DC consisted mainly of oral interactions or with me topping. I've never really been too interested into topping or bottoming but my only real opposition to it was risk of disease and the potential exposing position of it. We discussed only playing safely but he also assured me he did not have any STDs.

After three martinis he suggested we go back to his apartment instead of my hotel room. His reason were simple - it was closer and cabs weren't readily available. I gladly accepted his invitation. His apartment was a few blocks away - very nice and well appointed. He quickly showed me he latest health test and that put my mind at rest. As I figure most women or men reading this haven't witnessed a gay hook-up - the time from entry into the room to fully naked is pretty quick - less than few minutes. I'm not into kissing men but after we got naked we began exploring each others body.

He took the more dominant position and licked his way down my body. I have to say - I enjoyed playing the more passive role as he pushed me back into the bed and played with my nipples and cock. I was rock hard by the time he actually took me into his mouth. This was clearly the first stop for him, not the end destination... after teasing me a bit he pushed my legs back and dove into my ass with his tongue. I've never had a guy do this to me before but it definitely will not be the last time. He introduced a few fingers into my ass and slowly opened me up along with his tongue. It felt good but I was also hesitant in the direction this hook up was heading.

I suggested a more equitable position and took his cock in his mouth. Sucking cock is an interesting experience - I suggest all guys should try it a few times. I'm not great at it but I can get the job done. I should practice more but again its not my main interest. That being said - I don't like being mediocre at it. I'm not sure if I was terrible or he saw an opportunity but he clearly didn't want me to get him off with my mouth. As he pulled me off his dick he told me he wanted to take my ass.

We proceed to have yet another conversation about safety but unbelievably I heard myself agreeing as long as he used a condom, lube and would stop immediately upon my request. This might be a good time to describe his dick - over 7 inches, pretty thick and cut. I'm not sure why I decided my first time would be with a monster dick like this but I did. He went back between my legs and went quickly to the job of opening me up with his fingers. It wasn't long before he started putting on a condom and lubing my ass. I was on my back having a minor mental freak-out about what was to come all the while he was slowly stroking my very erect cock. As he moved off my cock - he slowly placed the head of his cock into me. Did it hurt? Every single 7 inches. It took about 5 minutes for him to get fully into me. Then he just stayed in me - I was still on my back on the bed and he was standing with my legs splayed. We stayed this way for awhile - he was playing with my dick and letting my get used to that full filling one gets with a cock in your ass.

At this point I need to share two observations - the most astonishing one for me was that I was still hard and the second one being I was actually getting used to his dick being inside me. Then the fucking started slowly at first... Over the next 15 minutes or so it got pretty intense but very enlightening. I learned to take his cock, I learned to manipulate my ass so I could squeeze his cock as it came in, and I found myself legitimately enjoying getting fucked. After we really got into the business of fucking - he came fairly quickly. He returned the favor by going down on me -- it wasn't long before I blew a thick load down his throat. I wanted to go again but it was really late and he didn't seem "up" for round two. A bit disappointing on that front but we had had a lot to drink and it was pushing 3am.

I hope you liked my story. I'm still straight, still kinky, but maybe just bit more open minded. Will I do it again? Who am I kidding - I'm sure I will. I think next time would be more fun with a bi couple.

Girl love I

Readers want to know about my experiences in tongue-worshipping. Here's a quick rundown:

Pam was my first. She was my suite-mate for a year in college. In a world of Courtneys, Amandas, Ambers, Tiffanys and Jennifers, we were Xers with baby boomer names. We always got along well and talked about guys incessantly. I was just getting started. Pam had been hooking up since she was 15, so I knew she was way ahead of me. Looks: She had the most lovely straight blond hair, angel face and tight body to die for.

One night, we had both been dumped by guys we were seeing and sitting on the sofa commiserating over a bottle of wine. She leaned over and kissed me. I can't say I had ever been sexually attracted to a woman before, but when her warm, soft mouth connected with mine it all changed. I didn't pull back. Pretty soon, we were in a mad makeout session and she was fingering my (very wet) pussy.

I was a virgin this way but always up for a challenge, so I undressed her and got on my knees. Her pussy was an "inny" with a very light dusting of pubic hair. She was extremely wet, too, and I loved her scent. I no doubt clumsily parted her outer lips to find a sweet pink blossom waiting for my tongue. It took her a long time to heat up to a full orgasm — she warned me. But, no problem. I was turned on and fascinated and licked away. She stroked my hair and called out my name until she was grinding her pelvis into my face. Then she let out this long, low moan and came. She returned the favor in the bedroom. "You have a beautiful pussy," she said, the first time I had ever heard that. She was aroused by my natural red hair, too. Pam had made love to other girls and her expertise was immediately evident. My previous lovers had given perfunctory licks, if that, before mounting me and pumping away for their own pleasure.

Pam took her time, kissing the insides of my legs, working her tongue all around my labia and inside me, then licking my clitoris with ever-increasing pressure. My feet were burning and I lost track of everything not connected to her tongue and my pussy. She held my hands tight as I let out scream after scream. It was my first mature orgasm. I thought later, "Wow! So that's an orgasm." Before that, I realized, I had baby orgasms from fingering myself or being fucked by some muscular, in-a-hurry young man. But nothing like this.

We held each other all night, in-between more of this wonderful new thing in my life. She sat on my face and we sixty-nined, both firsts for me. The next morning, I didn't feel any guilt, just extra horniness. For the rest of the year, we continued dating guys but also periodically ending up in bed together. I still get aroused thinking of her flawless skin and lovely hair. She's married with children now, but we still stay in touch.

After that, while I preferred men, I knew I could enjoy girl-love, too. And how.

Licking pussy

Things worked out well for my colleague. She followed my advice on fellatio, given verbally and with the Stakeout Banana, as we call it, and her boyfriend came after two minutes and said it was the best blowjob he ever had. She enjoyed it, too, and I can see her confidence growing. My bet is she'll want to try out her new-found talent elsewhere, not that I am encouraging such slutty Linda Sue behavior.

Ah, but there's a rub. Her boyfriend doesn't like cunnilingus. He does it, a few licks "like he's licking an ice-cream cone," and then he wants to climb on top and fuck her. This won't do. How many times do I have to say that oral sex goes both ways, must go both ways. Being a master cunnilinguist is a requirement to be my lover (beyond a quick romp where we never get that far, say where you bend me over and fuck me and we never see each other again...oh, sorry, I lost my train of thought).

So, pay attention men:

DO learn to love her vagina: The shape of her lips, their prominence, her scent, her juices, your juices mingled together, her pubic hair, perineum and anus. Women can tell if you're really into it, or if you're just doing it out of duty. If you're really into her private parts, it will make her more sensual and open to all sorts of fun.

DO tell her she's beautiful once you're "down there." She is.

DO take your time. I love it when a man works on my breasts a long time, then licks and kisses my abdomen and belly button, barely caressing his face across my pussy...then sucking my toes and kissing up each leg, up to my pussy and, again, barely touching my pussy before getting down to business.

DON'T go immediately for the clitoris. This may be too intense for many women. And you're cheating yourself out of much more...

DO spent time licking and gently sucking on her pussy lips Run your tongue around them. Revel in every detail (the right lip is bigger than the left, etc.).

DO tongue-fuck her. A man burying his face in my pussy and running his tongue in and our is sometimes enough in itself to drive me over the edge. Of course, his nose is also pushing against my clit as he does this.

DO use your hands. Caress her belly and legs, hold her hips, and as things really heat up (pay attention now) hold her hands. Most of us want that hand-holding connection.

DO learn the right approach for her clit. Start with a very light circling of it with your tongue and see how she responds. Some women want only that. Others will respond in a way that tells you it's okay to apply more pressure. Some like it when you suck their clits once they're aroused (me, among them). Vary things: Circle-lick her clit and go back to her lips or tongue-fucking her. Try licking her perineum and see if that pleases her. Keep coming back to the clitoris. Use different edges of your tongue: The tip, flat edge, side.

DO follow her responses and act accordingly. She'll relax more and let you in, set a rhythm, respond, get more and more aroused. When she starts to come, DON'T STOP! Keep going. You may want to let up the pressure a little. I'd probably be grinding my pelvis into your face.

Understand cunnilingus is different for most women than a blowjob is for men. Any guy wants his cock sucked. Many women have been conditioned to think "it's dirty down there," or they are afraid of losing control. So there's a major trust issue involved with many. You have to show you're trustworthy. Among other things that means being patient, slowly seducing her by kissing and licking her legs and belly, etc. Once you're good, you can move on to all sorts of fun: Face sitting, using toys, sixty-nine, licking her while another man fucks her. But it all begins with knowing expert tongue worship.

Have more to add? Please comment.

Sucking cock

New Years was quite nice. I'll leave it at that. For some reason, I don't want to blog about the Professor, at least not yet. Few of my men know that I do a sex blog and tell all. A couple of them knew and even helped me remember some details. For them, it was kinky and a turn-on. Most men wouldn't find that true, and even fewer women. I can't imagine Wendy and Pam, among others, would want all you guys masturbating to our romps together.

It's been so busy at work, Dear Diary. I did have fun with a young female colleague while we were spending some very boring hours in a car watching something I can't tell you about. We started talking about sex (yes, women do), and she was curious about how to give a great blowjob. Her boyfriend is ten years older and more experienced. Although she says he's very kind and taken with her, she knows she's "just not doing it right." We had a banana, and I showed her a few tricks until the thing started coming apart in my mouth. It reminded me, however, that oral sex is really important to men — do it well, and he'll never forget you.

It reminded me that the Fellatrices posts I did are lost forever. So I won't be repeating myself if I give a few tips:

1. DO drop your hang-ups. It's not "nasty" down there. If it really is, have him take a shower and give him a little talk about personal hygiene (or get a new bf).

2. DO play with his cock before you ever put it in your mouth. Stroke it, masturbate him, caress his balls, all while you're kissing him. Work down his body, kissing and licking his chest, nipples, belly button, thighs. One thing I like to do is to go down his body rubbing my (still!) tight, pert breasts across his chest and belly. I also let my hair fall on his skin and caress him. Make him want it.

3. DO praise his cock (honestly).

4. DO vary your technique. Maybe start out by taking it lightly in your mouth once...make him want it!...before licking the shaft and head in different ways. Take your time. Break it up by (gently!) licking his balls and taking them in your mouth while you stroke his penis. As he responds more and more...

5. DO take him fully in your mouth, in and out. Start lightly and increase the sucking pressure. The sweet spot is the area near where the shaft meets the head. Vary the amount you take in your mouth and the speed with which you suck him. If you're not ready for him to come and he's about there, slow down.

6. DO use your hands. I finally focus on sucking (harder and harder) the head and top of the shaft while I am moving my hand up and down on the rest of his shaft. Maybe with my other hand, I am stroking his balls. Note: When my hair is long, I pull it to one side over my shoulder so it doesn't get in the way. And, get comfortable yourself.

7. DO back off the pressure as he starts to come, so his orgasm doesn't become intensely painful. Make some noise.

8. DO swallow. If you're one of those rare women who really get nauseous from semen, then spit it out afterwards (a towel nearby).

9. DON'T let him hold your head down or force you, unless you're into that. Know how to let him know what you want, too. Gently remove that hand.

10. DON'T make loud, cow-like sucking sounds. Learn to breathe through your nose. Anyway, you want the maximum pressure applied.

11. DON'T be impatient. Some guys come fast, some need time. It's all good.

12. DON'T be afraid to be kinky and spontaneous. I love to greet a lover at the airport by sucking his cock in the parking garage. I've sucked cocks outdoors, beside a bar... Even a taste makes him want more.

And, keep learning. It took me years to perfect my "feather" blowjob technique. Don't be afraid to ask him how he likes it, either. Ladies and gay/bi gents: Add your advice in the comments section.